Short and Funny Jokes! Funny Christmas Jokes

Best first: What do snowmen do in their spare time? They’re just chilling.
    
 Funny Christmas jokes

Funny Christmas Jokes

 
Seriously, I wonder why Santa still uses reindeer to draw his sleigh every year. From what I understand, reindeer really suck at drawing.
What happens when snowmen fight?

They give each other the cold shoulder.
 Last Christmas I gave you my heart... well - that was the end of me...no one survives without a heart.
Why should you never mess with Santa?
Because he’s got a black belt.
It’s a good thing Santa doesn’t suffer from dyslexia. It would be inconvenient to receive a Christmas visit from Satan.
In the morning of Christmas Eve, a lady rummages through the last remaining turkeys in the supermarket freezer.
“Do they get any bigger by any chance?” she asks the shop assistant with a sigh.
He looks at her for a while and says, “No madam, they are quite dead.”
Which type of donuts does Santa prefer?

The ones with the ho-ho-hole.
Walking down the street I wonder if at Christmas we celebrate the birth of Jesus, or of General Electric.
 A dog is gazing up at the Christmas tree and sighs with satisfaction, “Oh, my master is the best, as always. What dog can say they’ve had electrical lights installed in their indoor toilet?”
What would you call an elf who is an excellent swimmer?

An elfin.
Where do snowmen keep money?

In a snow bank.
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