Short and Funny Jokes! New Jokes

Best first: What do you call the soft tissue between a shark's teeth?
The slow swimmer.
    
 new Jokes

New Jokes  
Fresh and Funny!


That moment when you have eye contact while eating a banana.
What do driving and dating have in common?
 
Both end up with you being chased by the police if you go too fast.
Two state clerks meet in the corridor. One asks the other, “Couldn't sleep either?”
Q: What do the Inuit get from sitting on a block of ice?

A. Polaroids.
There’s that moment when you put your steak on the grill and your mouth waters all over from that amazing smell. Do you vegans feel the same when you mow the grass?
What would you call a dinosaur with a surprisingly impressive vocabulary?
 
A thesaurus.
Two friends are talking, one says: “Man, I fell off a thirty-foot long ladder yesterday.”

“Oh no, dude, are you alright?!” inquires the other one, shocked.

“Yeah, I’m OK, I was only on the second rung then.”
Two immigrants from Africa arrive in the United States and are discussing the difference between their country and the U.S. One of them mentions he's heard that people in the U.S. eat dogs, and if they're going to fit in, they better eat dogs as well. So they head to the nearest hot dog stand and order two 'dogs.' The first guy unwraps his, looks at it, and nervously looks at his friend.
“Which part did you get?”
Men 1845: I just killed a buffalo.

Men 1952: I just fixed the roof.

Men 2016: I just shaved my legs.
Bruce Lee’s all-time favorite drink? Wataaaaaaaah!
And the lord said unto John, "Come forth and you will receive eternal life". John came fifth and won a toaster.
Next Part
Best New Jokes

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8 |
Part 9 | Part 10 |