The Best of Black Humor / Dark Jokes
Two cannibals are enjoying dinner. One compliments the other, “I say, Bill,
your wife really makes a great meal.”
Black humor is like a pair of healthy kidneys.
Not everyone has it.
They say you cannot outrun a bear. True, but don’t panic, usually it is
enough to outrun the chubbiest member of your hiking group.
A doctor tells a patient, “Sir, you are highly contagious
and must be placed in isolation. Until we get in contact with the CDC, your diet
will consist of pizza and fried eggs.”
“Will that help me get better
again?” asks the patient.
“Not really. But it's the only thing we can
shove in under the door.”
How did the dentist suddenly become a brain surgeon?
A slip of the hand.
I was at a restaurant and noticed my waitress had a black and blue eye. So I
made my order veeeery slowly. She's obviously not very good at
A doctor walks in a cemetery one afternoon when a hand shoots
through the earth and grabs his ankle. A hollow voice speaks from underneath
the ground,“You're a doctor, right? Do you have anything against
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