Funny Cat Jokes | Cat Humor
How many cats can squeeze into a regular sized empty box?
Just one.
After that the box isn’t empty anymore.
When you arrive home after work, your dog will be extremely happy to see you
and will lick your face.
The cat will still be mad at you for
leaving in the first place.
Emergency call at the police station:
“Please come quick. It’s
a
life and death situation. Our dog has become very aggressive. He might do something to
me.”
-
“Who is there?”
-
“The cat.”
A man drives deep into the forest to get rid of his cat. He lets her out at
an abandoned place. After one hour he gets a phone call from his wife: “The
cat is back.”
The man growls: “Ok, can you put her on, I got lost and need
directions.”
If TVs run on electricity and trucks run on gas, what do cats run on?
Their four paws.
More cat jokes:Why is it a bad idea to play poker with a
jungle cat?
Chances are it is a cheetah.
Bob to Joe, “What the heck, Joe, I’ve just heard your dog meowing. How come?!”
-
“Ah yeah, that’s OK! He is just learning a second language.”
A cat meets a fox in the forest.
The fox asks the cat why she smells
so dreadful.
The cat replies, “I was walking by a pooping bear and
he asked me if my fur makes fuzz. I said no. So he wiped his butt
with me.”
The fox wonders: “So how come you’re still in such a good
mood?”
“Well” the cat replies, “When he was done with me, he asked
the hedgehog.”
Two neighbors meet:
“Your cat killed my Pitbull.”
-
“No way, that is
impossible.”
-
“Yes, he choked on her.”
How many cats can squeeze into a regular sized empty box?
Just one.
After that the box isn’t empty anymore.
Went to the library and asked for a book on Pavlov’s dog and Schrodinger’s cat.
The librarian said it rang a bell but she didn’t know if it was there or not
Q: What do you call a cat that throws all the most expensive parties?
-
A: The Great Catsby
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