Birthday Jokes and Funny Birthday Wishes
It’s my wife’s birthday tomorrow. Last week I asked her what she wanted as a present.
“Oh, I don’t know,” she said . “Just give me something with diamonds.”
That’s why I’m giving her a pack of playing cards.
Q: What was the average age of a cave man?
A: Stone Age!
Clown at birthday party, annoying kid wants to see magic trick, don?t do magic, annoying kid, drop yer pants turn around and bend over, feel my thumb in yer ass?,
[hand gesture showing one thumb and then the other]
A boy asked his rich uncle for a cowboy outfit for his birthday.
So the uncle bought him a used car dealership.
Thank you for your birthday wishes on Facebook. Who are
you by the way?
Patient: Doctor, I get a strong stinging feeling in my eyes every time I eat
a birthday cake.
Doctor: Next time, blow out the candles.
From
a certain age, birthdays are like a reverse countdown.
Boyfriend: How come
you didn’t get me a present for my birthday?!
-
Girlfriend: Well, you did
tell me to surprise you.
I wanted to make you a rum cake for your birthday. But now I am drunk
and I’ve just eaten the cake.
Son, happy
birthday to you.
Now you are an adult and can take care of your own life and
determine what is best for you.
At least until you are married.
Happy Birthday. Soon you can
laugh, sneeze, cough and pee at the same time.
Knock-knock!
Who's there?
Abby!
Abby who?
Abby Birthday to
you!
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