Short and Funny Jokes! Funny Sayings

Best first: If you’re having a bad day, remember some adults wear braces.
 Funny sayings

Cool and Funny Sayings

I don't need a hair stylist, my pillow gives me a new hairstyle every morning
Why don't some couples go to the gym? Because some relationships don't work out.
Amusing sayings, humorous quotes, funny proverbs, phrases, slogans, smart remarks for any occasion, witty wisdoms for fun and reflection.

A balanced diet means a cupcake in each hand.
In the morning I can't eat, I'm thinking of you.
In the evening I can't eat, I'm thinking of you.
In the night I can't sleep.. I'm so hungry!
As long as cocoa beans grow on trees, chocolate is fruit to me.
Of course I have a talent. I'm really good in bed. Sometimes I sleep more than 9 hours in one go.

Do people talk about you behind your back? Simply fart.
If you’re having a bad day, remember some adults wear braces.

Hearing voices in your head is normal. Listening to them is quite common. Arguing with them – acceptable. It is only when you lose that argument that you get in real trouble.

My neighbors are listening to great music. Whether they like it or not.
Finally, the spring is here! I'm so thrilled I wet my plants.
... and out of the chaos, a sentence came to me:
"Laugh and be happy, it could be worse!"
... and so I laughed and was happy and it really became worse.
I have no friends. Even the toilet cover attacks me from the back.
There are people who are a living proof that total brain failure does not always lead to physical death.
Sometimes I drink water - just to surprise my liver.
According to my mirror I am pregnant. The father is Nutella.
Sometimes it’s time to lay on the couch and do nothing at all for two years.
I am nobody. Nobody is perfect. I am perfect.
It is important to make breaks between individual exercises. I personally stick to breaks of about 3-4 years.
If I can still lie on the ground without having to hold myself, I'm not drunk.

Organized people are simply too lazy to search for stuff.
"If I wanted to commit suicide, I would climb up to the height of your ego and jump down to your IQ level."
My relationship is like an iPad. I don't have an iPad.
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Funny Sayings

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