Short and Funny Jokes! Redneck Jokes

Best first: When you say “Look, a dead bird” to a redneck, chances are he will look up.
    
 Redneck Jokes

The Best Redneck Jokes

 
One leg to the other (of a redneck girl): Oh how nice, we finally meet.
What is a redneck dressed really smart? Artificial intelligence.
Redneck pick up lines:

1. Hey, you wanna come to me? The bed is still warm from mah brother.

2. Did you fart? ‘Cause you just blew me away.

3. Did you just touch my butt? Nah? Pity!

4. Oh baby, you are cooler than a set of snow chains.

5. Girl, I want you more than a new set of monster truck wheels.

6. Maybe you ain’t the most beautiful girl around but hey, true love’s just a light switch away.

7. Are you fertile?

8. You are so beautiful – you would fit perfectly in my trailer.

9. Shame I’ve got them diabetes. You’re so sweet I would eat you right away.

10. Say, does this smell like chloroform to ya?

11. You owe me a beer. I dropped mine when I saw you.

12. You look so familiar... are we related?

13. Hey wow! Are those real?

14. Would you like to increase my family’s genepool?

15. Between 1 to America, how free are you tonight?

16. I’m no weatherman but I think you'll totally get quite a few inches tonight.

17. Can I show you my collection of monster truck wheels?

18. So, you say you can lift a pig under each arm, gal?
How to keep a redneck busy (please see below)
How to keep a redneck busy (please see above)
Why did the redneck get colored pencils before he got his flu shot?

He heard that vaccines can make you artistic.
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of the Redneck Jokes

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* A small note: It is really NOT OK to use REDNECK JOKES, even though they're hilarious, to make people feel bad. In that game, nobody ever wins and even when people laugh with you at the time, no-one will ever win any friends this way.
 
Everything you give out influences you sooner or later, so better give out something positive. And the same time - enjoy these truly mean and ridiculously funny jokes, for academic purposes!