Really Funny Clean Jokes
Daddy
reads some bedtime stories to make little Jonny fall asleep.
Half
an hour later mommy opens quietly the door and asks: “And, is he asleep?”
Little Jonny answers: “Yes, finally.”
What should you do when you see a spaceman?
You just park in it, man.
Mummy, where were you when I was
born?
In the hospital.
And daddy?
At work.
That’s great. So nobody was home when I arrived.
Two clairvoyants meet. One says to the other: “You are fine, and how am I?
Two days ago, my friend Peter ran off with my wife.”
“Oh no, how
long have you been friends?”
“Since two days ago.”
“What's the name of your new dog?”
“I
don’t know. He won’t tell.”
What did one
wall say to the other wall?
-
We’ll meet at the corner.
Teacher: “OK class, who will
give me the chemical formula for water?”
Pupil: “HIJKLMNO.”
Teacher:
“What on earth are you on about?”
Pupil: “Well you said yourself
yesterday it was H to O!”
What do you call a bull that likes taking a nap?
-
A bulldozer!
What did the toilet roll complain about?
“People just
keep ripping me off!”
Q: Can a kangaroo jump higher than the Empire State Building?
A: Of course. The Empire State Building can't jump.
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