The Best Blonde Jokes!
* A small note to start with: It is NOT OK to use blonde jokes,
even the really hilarious ones, to make actual people feel bad.
That's a game that has no winners and nobody has ever gotten any
friends worth the name.
Everything you
give out will have an influence on you, so it's best to give out
something positive. And while you're at it, why not enjoy these truly
mean and ridiculously funny jokes, just, you know - for academic purposes!
A blonde meets up
with an old friend of hers, a brunette. Their talk goes in the direction of
lovers and the brunette says: “So I slept with a Brazilian…”
-
The blonde
gasps in surprise and asks excitedly, “Wow, so how many is a brazillion?”
Q: What should you do when a blonde tosses a pin at you?
-
A: Run! She has a
hand grenade in her mouth.
How do you get a one-armed blonde down from a tree?
-
Wave!
Q: What was a blonde’s first reaction to a box of Cheerios?
-
A: "Ooh look!
Doughnut seeds!"
Q: How many blonde jokes altogether are there? A: Just three. All the rest are
true stories.
A blonde ordered a pizza. The pizza guy asked if she wants it cut into six or
twelve pieces.
-
"Six, please. I would never be able to eat twelve pieces."
On a TV quiz, the show host asks a blonde participant:
“And here goes a
question from the area of science. The question is: If you were in a vacuum
and somebody called your name, would you hear it?”
-
The blonde tilts her
head and asks: “And the vacuum would be on or off?”
What do you call a blonde without breasts?
-
Leonardo di Caprio.
One day two blondes and a brunette got stuck in an elevator.
One blonde
starts to yell, “Help!!!”
Then the other one, “Help!!!”
The brunette
suggests, “Come on girls, let's scream together, it will be louder.”
“OK,”
agree the blondes, “Together!!! Together!!!”
Q: What do you call it when one blonde blows
in another blonde's ear?
A: Data transfer.
Two blondes fell down a hole. One said, 'It’s dark in here isn’t it?'
-
The other replied, 'I don’t know; I can’t see.'
<
First Part
of Blonde Jokes
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Part 2 |
Part 3 |
Part 4 |
Part 5 |
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