Short and Funny Jokes! Father One Liners

Best first: Stop whining, you will never be the man your mother is.
“But I’m really hungry!”
“And I’m really Dad.”
 Funny Dad jokes

Good Old Dad Jokes

Do you know Beethoven’s favourite fruit?

The ba-na-na-naaaa…
Daddy, can I hold your hand?
Nah, that’s very kind but it’s not that heavy.
Two penguins meet. One says, “Jesus it is cold today.

The other hisses, “Shut up. Penguins can’t talk.”
“What is a bunny without a carrot?”
Q: What happens to mountains when they touch each other?

A: nothing.
Did you hear about the new movie constipation? It hasn’t come out yet.
When did John McEnroe arrive at Wimbledon?

About tennish.
Two walls arrange a date – “I’ll meet you at the corner.”
How do you make a paper tissue dance? You put a little boogie in it!
Dad, I’m hungry!”

“Oh hello Hungry, I’m Dad!”

“But I’m really hungry!”

“And I’m really Dad.”
Why didn’t the Orange drive when the lights turned green again? No juice!
“Dad, can you make me a sandwich, please?”

Dad: “Abrakadabra, you are now a sandwich!”
I told my dad that he should embrace his mistakes. He had tears in his eyes. Then he hugged my sister and me.
Q. Dad, can you put my shoes on?
A. I don’t think they’ll fit me.
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