Short and Funny Jokes! Top 50 Pirate Jokes and Puns

Best first: Q: Where do pirates put their weapons?
A: In their enemies.
 Pirate Jokes Arr...

Very Funny Pirate Jokes and Puns

It’s amazing, really, how bad reputation pirates get.

Just think of how many of them have been cannonized!

Oh no, sir, I said pirate ship. What on Earth would possess me to call you a pile of shit?!

Q: How did Captain Hook died?

A: Multiple stabbings. He got a bad case of an itchy rash.

Most veteran pirates can only think about sailing the seas again.

They’ve got ship for brains.

How can you tell a pirate has fallen for modern technology?

It’s the iPatch that gives it away.

Q: What should you do when you see a coughing pirate?

A: Run, he probably has the SAAARRRRRRS!
Q: Why is it impossible to take a picture of a pirate with an iron hook?

A: Seriously?  Have you ever tried taking a picture with an iron hook?!

What is the most favorite pirating song, surprisingly?

Don’t cry for me, Arrrrrrgentina...

How did the pirate become a boxing champion so fast?

Nobody was ready to take on his right hook.

Q: What would a pirate wear for his Halloween costume?

A: A pumpkin patch.

Q: Q: How much did the pirate pay for his piercings?

A: A buck-an-ear.

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