Kids jokes
Teacher: “You got a zero in the last exam.”
Roger: “I don’t think I
deserve a zero!”
Teacher: “Neither do I. But I can’t go any lower
than that.”
Do you know a tree’s favorite drink?
-
Root beer!
Q: What spends its days lying about on the ground but never gets dirty?
-
A: A shadow.
What do you get when you cross a vampire and a teacher?
-
Lots of blood tests!
What begins with P, ends with E, and has a gazillion letters in it?
-
The Post
Office!
How do you start a communication with a fish?
-
You drop him a line!
A plane with 4 people on board is about to crash. The 4 people are the
pilot, the president, the world’s smartest man and a ten-year-old. They only
have 3 parachutes between them.
The president cries: “I’m the
president, people need me to live!” and he jumps out.
The world’s
smartest man cries, “I’m the world’s smartest man, I’m needed in the world!”
and he jumps out.
The pilot sighs and says, “You take the last
parachute, kid, I’ll go down with the plane, that’s my job.”
The kid
smiles, “No need, there are still two parachutes left. The world’s smartest
man took my backpack.”
When do you stop at green and go full speed at red?
-
When you're enjoying a
watermelon!
Q: Why does the traffic light go red sometimes?
-
A: So would you if you had
to change in the middle of a busy intersection!
Teacher: Okay class, when I ask you a question, I want you all to answer me
at once. How much is six times 3?
-
Class: “At once!”
Q: What do lawyers usually wear when they go to court?
-
A:
Lawsuits!
How can you open a banana?
-
With a monkey!
What did one plate say to his friend?
-
Tonight, dinner’s on me!
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